Maroon and Gold

Sometimes I'm a perfectionist, I'm always competitive, and I never like to embarrass myself. Therefore, when it comes to trying new things, I prefer to do things I know I can do well. I know my strengths, and I stick to them. It's not that I don't try new things, but if I'm going to try something new, it's going to be something that I know with enough hard work, I'll be successful. I've always been that way. Anything I did in high school, I gave 110% of myself to in order to do well: cheerleading, FFA, band, academics...

Once again, sometimes I'm a perfectionist, I'm always competitive, and I never like to embarrass myself. That's a lethal combination for someone who loves sports, but has a limited athletic ability. If someone had told me in high school that I would one day be considered a runner, I wouldn't have even laughed, I would have just walked away. I stuck to cheerleading and gymnastics. Those were my strong suits. At the time I would have put running dead last on a list of possibilities. (That coming from someone who can't throw a ball well, yet I still would have put running last.)

Fast forward 5 years out of high school, no more free college gym, a person who enjoys working out, and there I found myself "running." I had just read my alma mater's Maroon and Gold: Eldon Alumni Magazine. One of the sections was written by and about a childhood friend's mom, also my middle school secretary. She had taken up running herself and talked about how she got started. One of her quotes stood out to me. Highly paraphrased, she said she always ran at nightfall, because she was afraid of being judged by passersby. Then one day she decided that was stupid. She's out there running, making herself better, and she shouldn't be embarrassed about that.

From then on I made it my goal not to care what people passing me might think while I attempted to run. So I continued. I never set goals for a distance or a pace, I just ran when, where, and what I could. Honestly, running here in SW Missouri was easier than running when I visited my parents. If the hills, curves, and road without a shoulder wasn't enough to scare me off, the thought of an old childhood friend seeing me put me over the edge. It took a few months before I was brave enough to run in Eldon, but I finally did it. Eventually, it turned into my favorite running spot. I get so caught up in the woodland view, it distracts me from struggling through a run.

I never planned on running any type of race. I wasn't good enough or crazy enough for that nonsense! I simply practiced setting aside my need to be perfect, desire to be the best, and fear of embarrassment. What I found was something I thought, I might, kind of, sort of, maybe one day, enjoy.